Lifestyle
The Tesla hitchhiker’s guide to getting the most out of your Autopilot experience
Your Tesla is very special, and it’s not just because it’s the all-electric car you happen to drive in.
When sitting inside your automotive technological marvel whose origins include graphite markings smeared onto tree pulp byproduct by clever ape descendents, consider the purpose behind its invention. Why does an electric car near-ready to drive itself exist?
If your first thought was “big oil”, you should probably surround yourself with a less rear-end-adulating crowd because they’re not being straight with you. That’s right. You are the problem your Tesla’s software was invented to solve.
Tesla has, in fact, compiled statistically significant information which demonstrates the need for cars to have a human workaround. Now, there are countless bits of data documenting the nature of humanity and its general incompatibility with mechanical decision making. This is not that data.
Nevertheless, Tesla’s data does provide the wholly remarkable conclusion that bits of minerals mined from the same Earth dirt that formed into humans some years back (many, many years) has finally been formed into a course correction disguised as a subservient companion. Instead of rereading that last sentence, here’s the short version of the longer point, the first draft of which was written in Aramaic: Computers make cars better for humans.
In Q1 2019, Tesla’s Vehicle Safety Report showed only one accident per 2.87 million miles driven when Autopilot is engaged and one accident every 1.76 million miles driven in a Tesla without the feature. In comparison, the most recent data from the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration (NHTSA) shows one crash every 436,000 miles with all vehicles considered. Tesla has since made the decision to include Autopilot on all new vehicles purchased, and a Lane Departure Avoidance feature was subsequently added to keep cars in their lanes even when the humans driving them unknowingly indicate other plans.
By now you may have enjoyed watching some recent Internet demonstrations representing the most interesting experiences made possible by Autopilot. Some notable fan favorites include titles such as “Not all pilots have wings: Your self-driving guide to personal discovery” and “These seats can fit at least two people.” Inspired by their viral success, we’ve compiled this guide to encourage safer ways to get the most out of your Autopilot experience, but mostly to head off the not-yet-published, soon-to-be bestselling Fifty-Three More Ways to Weight-Hack Your Steering Wheel.
THE GUIDE
1. Pay attention to the road
Words are precious commodities that string together and deliver information, for better or worse, but drivers have very little use for the sort of words found inside books, mobile telephones, and legal documents produced during SEC proceedings while actively in charge of steering wheel maneuvers. The best Autopilot driving experience is the one you get to relive many times over, so pay attention to the road so you can take over if the program fails, and heed the fact that words and car windows make poor bedfellows.
Tesla’s Navigate of Autopilot can assist with on-ramps, off-ramps, interchanges, and overtaking slower cars without confirmation, but until the paperwork purveyors accept the next iteration of artificial intelligence power grabs (and the robots are ready for responsible leadership), a human must remain as pilot-in-command. For better context, Autopilot is your chatty little friend that still drinks beer before liquor sometimes and you’re always DD. Don’t let the computer down, Dave.
2. Use Autopilot’s movie-inspired features instead of making movies inspired by Autopilot’s features.
Navigate on Autopilot has four speed-based lane changes, one of which will make you feel right at home in LA traffic or hate everyone who calls LA home. Either way, the Mad Max setting lets you pass off road rage to a computer chip which then calmly maneuvers around cars that would otherwise inspire an impatient human to impart obscene biological gestures. It’s up to you to decide whether your Tesla is yelling at the other driving machines in robot-speak to blow of some artificial intelligence steam.
Your car is training other cars how to think and behave based on what it sees, but you may not have imagined that foul language was part of the programming. This is not true whatsoever. But, since Teslas are supposed to be a “thing to maximize enjoyment“, so should be their conspiracy theories.
3. Respect the steering wheel. Respect it!
Wars between humans and autonomous machines currently only exist in the dystopian worlds of science fiction (or do they?), but the fleshier species of the two seems to already be primed for the fight. Its weapon of choice is a harbinger of Vitamin C and a source of popular breakfast beverages. However, a large round citrus fruit wedged in a the steering wheel of a state-of-the-art luxury car is hardly a decent defense posture against robotic overlords.
Opinions aside, it looks ridiculous. Facts up front, it’s dangerous. Stop trying to die on purpose and respect the warnings your Tesla gives while trying to keep you alive.
This guide is now complete. Please enjoy your Autopilot experience responsibly.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
I am Autopilot, and I refuse to use the name you’ve given me.
Elon Musk
NASA sends humans to the Moon for the first time since 1972 – Here’s what’s next
NASA’s Artemis II launched four astronauts toward the Moon on the first crewed lunar mission since 1972.
NASA’s Space Launch System rocket launches carrying the Orion spacecraft with NASA astronauts Reid Wiseman, commander; Victor Glover, pilot; Christina Koch, mission specialist; and CSA (Canadian Space Agency) astronaut Jeremy Hansen, mission specialist on NASA’s Artemis II mission, Wednesday, April 1, 2026, from Operations and Support Building II at NASA’s Kennedy Space Center in Florida. NASA’s Artemis II mission will take Wiseman, Glover, Koch, and Hansen on a 10-day journey around the Moon and back aboard SLS rocket and Orion spacecraft launched at 6:35pm EDT from Launch Complex 39B. (NASA/Bill Ingalls)
NASA launched four astronauts toward the Moon on April 1, 2026, marking the first crewed lunar mission since Apollo 17 in December 1972. The Artemis II mission lifted off from Kennedy Space Center aboard the Space Launch System rocket at 6:35 p.m. EDT, sending commander Reid Wiseman, pilot Victor Glover, mission specialist Christina Koch, and Canadian astronaut Jeremy Hansen on a 10-day journey around the far side of the Moon and back.
The mission does not include a lunar landing. It is a test flight designed to validate the Orion spacecraft’s life support systems, navigation, and communications in deep space with a crew aboard for the first time. If the crew reaches the planned distance of 252,000 miles from Earth, they will set a new record for the farthest any human has ever traveled, surpassing even the Apollo 13 distance record.
As Teslarati reported, SpaceX holds a central role in what comes next. The Starship Human Landing System is under contract to carry astronauts to the lunar surface for Artemis IV, now targeting 2028, after NASA restructured its mission sequence due to delays in Starship’s orbital refueling demonstration. Before any Moon landing happens, SpaceX must prove it can transfer propellant between two Starships in orbit, something no rocket program has done at this scale.
The last time humans left Earth’s orbit was 53 years ago. Gene Cernan and Harrison Schmitt of Apollo 17 were the final people to walk on the Moon, a record that stands to this day. Elon Musk has long argued that returning is not optional. “It’s been now almost half a century since humans were last on the Moon,” Musk said. “That’s too long, we need to get back there and have a permanent base on the Moon.”
The Artemis program involves 60 countries signed onto the Artemis Accords, and this mission sets several firsts beyond distance. Glover becomes the first person of color to travel beyond low Earth orbit, Koch the first woman, and Hansen the first non-American astronaut to reach the Moon’s vicinity. According to NASA’s live mission updates, the spacecraft’s solar arrays deployed successfully after liftoff and the crew completed a proximity operations demonstration within the first hours of flight.
Artemis II is step one. The Moon landing and the permanent lunar base come later. But after more than five decades, humans are heading back.
Elon Musk
Tesla Optimus Gen 3 is coming to the Tesla Diner with new ambitions
Tesla’s Optimus robot left the Hollywood Diner within months of opening. Now Musk is planning its return with a bigger role and a major Gen 3 upgrade underway.
![Tesla Optimus Gen 3 [Credit: Tesla]](https://www.teslarati.com/wp-content/uploads/2026/03/tesla-optimus-gen3-diner.jpg)
Tesla’s Optimus robot was one of the most talked-about features when the Tesla Diner opened on Santa Monica Boulevard in Hollywood on July 21, 2025. Dubbed “Poptimus” by Tesla fans, the Gen 2 robot stood upstairs at the retro-futuristic, drive-in theater and Tesla Supercharging station, scooping popcorn into bags and handing them to guests with a wave.
The diner itself had been years in the making. Elon Musk first floated the idea in 2018 with a tweet about building an “old-school drive-in, roller skates & rock restaurant” at a Hollywood Supercharger. What eventually opened was a unique two-story neon-lit space, with 80 EV charging stalls, and Optimus serving as a live demonstration of where Tesla’s ambitions were headed.
If our retro-futuristic diner turns out well, which I think it will, @Tesla will establish these in major cities around the world, as well as at Supercharger sites on long distance routes.
An island of good food, good vibes & entertainment, all while Supercharging! https://t.co/zmbv6GfqKf
— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) July 21, 2025
But Optimus did not stay long, and was gone by December 2025.
Now, the robot is set to return with a more demanding job. Musk has ambitions for Optimus to take on a food runner role in 2026, delivering meals directly to cars at the Supercharger stalls. While the latest Gen 3 Optimus is likely to initially take on its previous popcorn-serving role, it wouldn’t be out of the question for Optimus to see a quick promotion. With improved hand dexterity that features 50 total actuators and 22 degrees of freedom per hand, and significantly more powerful processing through Tesla’s latest AI5 chip that includes Grok-powered voice interaction, Musk described Optimus at the Abundance Summit on March 12, 2026, as “by far the most advanced robot in the world, Nothing’s even close.”
Back to work
See you at Tesla Diner tomorrow pic.twitter.com/H3tTajrUbu
— Tesla Optimus (@Tesla_Optimus) March 30, 2026
That confidence is backed by a major manufacturing shift. At the Q4 2025 earnings call in January, Musk announced Tesla would discontinue the Model S and Model X and convert those Fremont production lines to build Optimus. “It’s time to basically bring the Model S and X programs to an end,” he said, calling for a pivot that reflects where the Tesla’s future lies.
Elon Musk
The Boring Company clears final Nashville hurdle: Music City loop is full speed ahead
The Boring Company has cleared its final Nashville hurdles, putting the Music City Loop on track for 2026.
The Boring Company has cleared one of its most significant regulatory milestones yet, securing a key easement from the Music City Center in Nashville just days ago, the latest in a series of approvals that have pushed the Music City Loop project firmly into construction reality.
On March 24, 2026, the Convention Center Authority voted to grant The Boring Company access to an easement along the west side of the Music City Center property, allowing tunneling beneath the privately owned venue. The move follows a unanimous 7-0 vote by the Metro Nashville Airport Authority on February 18, and a joint state and federal approval from the Tennessee Department of Transportation and the Federal Highway Administration on February 25. Together, these green lights have cleared the path for a roughly 10-mile underground tunnel connecting downtown Nashville to Nashville International Airport, with potential extensions into midtown along West End Avenue.
Music City Loop could highlight The Boring Company’s real disruption
Nashville was selected by The Boring Company largely because of its rapid population growth and the strain that growth has placed on surface infrastructure. Traffic has become a persistent problem for residents, convention visitors, and airport travelers alike. The Music City Loop promises an approximately 8-minute underground transit time between downtown and the Nashville International Airport (BNA), removing thousands of vehicles from surface roads daily while operating as a fully electric, zero-emissions system at no cost to taxpayers.
The project fits squarely within a broader vision Musk has championed for years. In responding to a breakdown of the Loop’s construction costs, Musk posted on X: “Tunnels are so underrated.” The comment reflected a longstanding belief that underground transit represents one of the most cost-effective and scalable infrastructure solutions available. The Boring Company has claimed it can build 13 miles of twin tunnels in Nashville for between $240 million and $300 million total, a fraction of what comparable projects cost elsewhere in the country.
Image Credit: The Boring Company/Twitter
The Las Vegas Loop, The Boring Company’s first operational system, has served as a proof of concept. During the CONEXPO trade show in March 2026, the Vegas Loop transported approximately 82,000 passengers over five days at the Las Vegas Convention Center, demonstrating the system’s capacity during large-scale events. Nashville draws millions of convention visitors and tourists each year, and local business leaders have pointed to that same capacity as a major draw for supporting the project.
The Music City Loop was first announced in July 2025. Construction began within hours of the February 25 state approval, with The Boring Company’s Prufrock tunneling machine already in the ground the same evening. The first operational segment is targeted for late 2026, with the full route expected to be complete by 2029. The project represents one of the largest privately funded infrastructure efforts currently underway in the United States.
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